Broken Home

Hi everyone, sorry I haven't updated like I should, but this blogging thing has proven to be a lot harder than I thought, writing about my feelings, and sharing it with so many of you, has opened a door I thought long closed. I find myself missing my family and my country more and more each day. I thought I had assimilated, I thought I wasn't homesick anymore, I thought I was happy, but to be honest, now I don't really know what I think.

I picture myself feeling like a child from divorced parents might feel... I have two countries I love, each of them has given me so much, and now I'm torn apart, trying to decide where I really want to be, which one I love the most.

Do I want to be in Mexico? Where my family is, where I spent the first 20 years of my life, where I became who I am today? Do I want to live in the US, where my children were born, where I found a whole new family made of loving and caring friends and where I've grown so much?

Some of you might say, "Just go back to your country if you miss it that much", but the thing is, THIS is my country too!! At least I think so sometimes, and some other times I feel like such an outsider, do other people feel like me? I remember feeling like an outsider in Mexico sometimes, I guess you can feel like an outsider in your own family....

What would you do? Have you ever felt like me?